Saying Goodbye to Nanny
Hello!
I am saddened to announce that my grandmother passed away this morning after 5 years of vascular dementia, though to reach 88 is no mean feat so I think she did really well. It feels odd to be finally writing this as we had expected this for a long time, especially over the past year. And in truth, we lost the person she used to be 5 years ago after a long stint in hospital so we've already grieved for her and now it's a saddened relief that she's finally at peace. So, in light of her death, I'd like to write about the person she was because I think that it's important that we cherish the healthy memories of her.
To describe her in three words, she was brusque, strong, and kind. She never allowed herself to be made inferior and she had extremely violent opinions on Andrew Lloyd Webber ("I can't stand that man!") but she worried, and would always ring you up to make sure she hadn't upset you. She was always there for a cuddle and I'll always remember her presenting me with a packet of fruit pastilles at the end of each visit and saying "you've been such a good girl today."
Not only was she kind but she was the first woman to teach me to be a feminist. From an early age she explained the importance of voting as a woman and she told me that I must work hard, get into a good university, and show those men what you're made of. So, when people ask if I'm going to go home because she's died, the answer is no, not until the funeral. She would have got very cross indeed if she thought I would have missed class for her death. No, I will be there for her funeral and will make sure everyone has enough sandwiches as she once said that that was what funerals were really about. And when I graduate, I will think of her. In a way it's sad she had to go before I graduated because I would have loved to show my degree to my little 90 year old Nanny, even if she didn't know who I was anymore. I think she would have said well done anyway. Aside from that, I know she would have been proud.
She was a woman who was genuinely interested in people and we always joked that if we couldn't find her, she would have found out the life story of someone she'd met in a cafe. And I think it was this genuine interest that made her such a beloved teacher at Filton College in Bristol. She taught business and she was brilliant at it. A total girl boss in fact. People came from all over to be taught by her and I really do hope that those students remember her, whatever they're doing now. It seems cruel that we called her nosey when she spoke to other people because now I'm an adult in this screen-obsessed world, I feel so inspired by her and wholeheartedly believe that if we were all as interested in the lives of the people around us as she was, the world would be a much happier place.
I adored her. I still adore her. And I have missed her terribly these past five years and I am relieved that she will no longer have to suffer any more pain or confusion. I won't wear black to her funeral; instead I will wear florals because she always loved them. So, goodbye my darling, sleep tight.
Lots of Love,
Sarah xxx
